Talking has never been something I've struggled to do. I'm pretty adept at the whole thing. I'll talk to pretty much anyone who will listen. It's my gift or a listener's curse, just depends on how you look at it. So, I'm sitting here in North Carolina wondering what I'll speak on at She Speaks in a few days. I have a three minute talk and five minute talk to present. It sounds short and they are. I'm used to speaking for 30 to 50 minutes and having one to three sessions to get my point across. I have three minutes and five minutes. I usually take that much time just doing the introductions and thanks.
So here I am, trying to figure out which message is the right one.
I want to be perfect. I want to it to be JUST RIGHT. I want to wear the right clothes, gesture just so, have the perfect inflection, and rock some cute heels, but what about the message. Seems I've spent more time on the outside of this message than the heart of it. I know the Lord has a message for me and I know He's given it to me. It's buried under all this material stuff. It's buried under the cute jacket, fresh highlights and a spray on Mystic Tan. It's buried in the heart of this woman who is excited and absolutely terrified. I want them to like me. I want to fit in. What if no one speaks to me? What if they laugh? My insecurities are raging and my heart is in a tizzy.
I take a deep breath. Even though this talk is to an evaluation group, it's still God's Word. It's still my testimony and God will use it for His glory. I breath out. God is good. He is the God who called me out of darkness into His marvelous light. (1Peter 2:9)
He has a called me to a work, His work, and I will continue on in it. (Phil 1:6)
I won't worry about the perfect jacket, the best shoes, or the just-right accessories. I will wrap my head and heart around the Word He has for me to share. I will submit my will before Him, repent of my selfish junk and move forward.
I'll pour my heart out to Him, fall face first into His Word and trust that He will show me the way. For He is good. All the time.
If you'll be at She Speaks I hope we get to meet. And if my accessories aren't just rights or my spray tan is faded, overlook it and take a look at my heart.