Why? Why is it so important for me to be busy? What am I trying to prove and to who? (or is it whom? I never get that right!)
I love doing God's work and I'm so very blessed to be doing it. I'm working on this so-busy-equals-so-cool syndrome that I seem to have contracted. I'm not impressed with my busy schedule. I love having down time. I'm a big downtime girl. I love sleeping late and spending the whole day doing nothing but reading (with the occasional meal tossed in for good measure).
I love just pulling out my Bible and reading until I find that one passage of scripture that makes me want to dig deeper. Then I grab the research books and go to work. I do a word study and then I'll really pour over the passage. This is great stuff for me….but lately I've been to busy to do much of this.
The roar in my ife is deafening. My brain is always thinking about this project, that report, this deadline, that event, this commitment, and that promise. The noise is deafening — so deafening that I can't hear anything but these to dos swirling through my mind.
Right now, I put down my busy wand. (Yep, you get busy enough and you get a wand. The wand just holds you in place because now you thing you're in charge of your little kingdom of busy). I've retired my busy-ness cape and I've given back the wizard hat. I've retired from the busy-ness of my life.
I realize that I'm not going to be able to talk the “I'm so busy” talk anymore, but that's okay. I also realize that people may also look at me like I'm a slacker — that okay, too.
I want to start each day with “Lord, guide my steps today. Let me get through everything that is important to You and not to sweat the other stuff. Let me be more concerned with reaching people, than I am with being busy. Please let all that I do be glorifying to You.”
Withdrawal will set in when it hits me I only have one project to juggle, but I am hoping that I will get through this stage fairly quickly. I'm excited about this new, not so busy life that I'm making. I
know that God has plans for this life that is quieter — quiet enough to hear His voice.
Quiet enough to know that He is speaking to me.
Quiet enough to hear His call on my life.
I know there is so much I'm missing in this roar, I know that God will use this new place of peace.