As most of you know, I’m working on dropping a few pounds before my darling princess daughter gets married in two months. I woke up yesterday and thought – oh my word, it’s only two months! Where did the time go? I thought we had plenty of time to get everything done? Do we have all the stuff for the favors? What about Vaughn’s tuxedo – we have to get that ordered? What will I wear to the wedding? I don’t want to buy one in my current size. How in the world am I going to lose 40 pounds in two months? Is that possible? What if I only drink water between now and May 17th? Can you live on only water? Maybe toss in some tuna (water packed) every couple of days?
Anyway, that’s what raced through my brain in a matter of seconds. And so I decided that if the guy on the Biggest Loser can lose 100 pounds in 10 weeks, I can lose 30 pounds in 8 weeks – it’s only 3.75 pounds a week. I can do this (this is me giving myself a pep talk)! I can live off 1000 calories a day. I’ll just eat yogurt for breakfast, an apple for lunch and that gives me 800 calories for dinner. And I’ll drink water – lots of it.
So today was the beginning of my 1000 calorie diet. I started out so good. I ate my 90 calorie yogurt for breakfast. I walked for 40 minutes on an outdoor walking trail – me and my Mom. Then I headed over to Wal-Mart to pick up a few things (don’t you always need a few things from Wal-Mart?) And fifteen minutes and $50 later I’m standing in the checkout line and I’m starving! This isn’t the run of the mill, I need something to eat hunger, this is true I need food NOW hunger. I eyed the candy bars – too full of sugar and fat; thought about the chips – too much fat; and then I saw it – EXTRA gum, watermelon flavor. I remember what the trainers on The Biggest Loser had just said last week — Extra gum helps curb that hungry feeling. So, I snatched up a pack of EXTRA gum and finished checking out.
I walked out of the store feeling good about myself – I’ve got the willpower, I can do this thing. I popped a piece of that watermelon flavored gum in my mouth and I began to chew. I believed that the gum would take the edge off the hungry feeling.
I drove along passing by the fast food places – that feeling of smugness just continuing to grow. The gum was working and I had this whole food thing handled. That 89 cent pack of gum kept my hunger at bay, but not as much as those 3 for $1 chocolate chip cookies from McDonalds did. That’s right — my car just swerved across three lanes of traffic and swung into the McDonald’s drive thru — I was like a woman possessed.
So, here I sit – coming down from my cookie high and wiping the chocolate from my mouth. I’m realizing that my first mistake was thinking that I could do this thing alone – I need an army helping me lose weight. So, I’ll commit this weight loss to Him and I’ll pray like a madwoman – and I’ll stay out of the McDonald’s drive thru! But I will tell you this that whole thing about gum filling you up – don’t buy it. The chocolate chip cookies did a much better job!