Have you ever done anything that scares the SNOT out of you?
I mean really terrifies you? Like I-may-just-wet-your-pants-before-I-get-through-this-one kind of scared.
Personally I try to avoid this kind of scary, but sometimes it’s just downright unavoidable. You have to jump out of the boat and into the deep end to experience life (and yes, I’m speaking to myself here).
It’s so much easier to hang out in the swallow end. It’s comfortable in the swallow place. I can see the bottom and I know what to expect.
The deep end is filled with the unknown. The unknown is scary. The unknown is … unknown.
For years I longed to be a speaker. I wanted to communicate God’s truths to women. I wanted to share my passion for His Word with others. I wanted to be a speaker. And more than just wanting it, I KNEW the Lord was calling to this path. It was clear to me, but I was terrified to step off into that deep place. I was scared to death to DECLARE myself a speaker.
I thought people would laugh at me.
Or worse, I thought they would say that I wasn’t qualified. Because I’m not. I’m not a seminary graduate or a professionally trained orator. I’m just a girl who loves Jesus.
I stepped into that scary place many years back and the Lord has been so wonderful to me. He’s teaching me to keep my eyes on Him and let all else fade away. He’s my lifeline in the deep.
Over the years the deep place becomes shallow. I’m comfortable telling people I’m a speaker. I’ve gained confidence — not in myself, but in the work the Lord has called me to.
I’ve been walking this walk for some time and I’m getting comfortable here. Now the Lord is calling me into a new deep place — and I don’t want to go. I enjoy this swallow place. I don’t worry that people will laugh at me. I trust the Lord will provide as He always have. I’ve found my niche … or so I thought.
It’s in the deep you look for strength outside of yourself. It’s in the deep I hold out my hand to the One who holds me together. It’s in the deep I look to God to be my strength and my deliverer.
For me stepping into the deep means I’m trusting God to hold me up. And that’s what I’m doing, I’m trusting God to provide the way and clear this path.
It’s scary out here, but God is here and He promises never to leave me. There’s something powerful out here in this deep and often scary place. The powerful is God. I can’t stand on my own strengths here. I have none. I don’t have the skills, the confidence, or the experience to do this. Only God.
He alone is my Hope and my Strength. And that’s enough.
What about you? Have you stepped into any scary places lately?
Are you willing to let go and just let God?
Those who go to God Most High for safety will be protected by the Almighty. I will say to the Lord “You are my place of safety and protection. You are my God and I trust you.” Ps 91:1-2
Mary,
I think I’m where you were. I have a desire based on God’s leading to be a Bible speaker (for lack of a better term). I was to share with others what God is teaching me.
Perhaps He will just keep me teaching in my home church. But, I feel a call to step into the water and wade out deeper.
Just waiting to see how He is going to do it. Because I haven’t a clue!
Sheryl