I love people — just LOVE them.
I love traveling with my family and hanging out with them. They are my favorite people, but after them I love girlfriends. I love talking to them, hanging out with them and just doing life with them.
Some of my best girlfriends live right around me and some are scattered across the map. Some I met at church, kids events, or through friends. Others I met through blogs and twitter. They are all precious to me and I adore each of them.
Anne Jackson wrote about boundaries in our lives today in her post The Drawbridge where she quotes Nouwen.
Boundaries. I've never been really good with that and it's cost me so much in the past. If I meet you and like you, well, that's it. We're friends and I just open up my life and my heart to you. I assume that everyone wants to be friends and have a good time. I assume everyone loves the Lord, loves to laugh and likes spending time with girlfriends. I just jump into friendships with both feet — and land smack in the middle of the deep end of the pool. How's that for mixing some metaphors.
I'm just not good at placing boundaries. I'm getting better. God has called me to ministry to and with women and I love this calling. He's also calling me to a more mature place in relationships. I'm not loving that part. I'm learning to take a deep breath before jumping in to a friendship and in that deep breath I ask God to affirm the friendship. In that deep breath I ask God to reveal His will for this relationship. In that deep breath I ask God for direction.
God has blessed me beyond measure with this call on my life and my heart. I'm blessed to write for two incredible women focused groups. One is Extraordinary Women and the other is the Girls Get Away Cruise . I'm blessed by the women I meet on these blogs and by the women I serve alongside.
I'm blessed with lots of friends, but I'm not surrounded with them. I'm blessed with wonderful friends, but I don't see them much. It's a season the Lord has me in. It's a season of growth and change.
I'm learning to keep boundaries and still live outside the lines — not God's lines, but man's. I want to experience the adventure of a life fully lived in Christ. I want to be used by God in whatever way he chooses. I want to reach beyond myself and grasp the reality of serving the indescribable, un-tameable , magnificent God. I want to live life by His will, not mine.
I'm learning to open my heart to friendships, but to proceed with caution. I'm learning to trust God's plan more and mine less. My plans never seem to turn out the way I envision.
As I travel this path of friendship and ministry, I am awestruck at the God who calls me to something that I so dearly love.
Where is God leading you?
We’ve discussed the whole boundaries in friendship thing haven’t we?? Oh, the lifelong lessons…
I’m still not sure where He’s leading me, although I continue to be pulled toward the post-abortive healing arena (even though I’ve never had one). But God. His ways are not our ways, but they are always BETTER!
A couple of things…first off, I can’t wait to meet you at the blog conference in Florida in October. And second, I have chosen your blog as one of my ‘blogs of the month’ this month. It will post on Wed, June 3rd.
I look forward to huggin you in person.
Hey, Mary! I haven’t stopped by in a while. I haven’t been reading blogs much lately, to tell you the truth. Things have been too busy!
Anyway, as always, I love your writing. With this post, though, I kept waiting for something…some details that never came. Perhaps a story that was on your mind as you were writing but were leaving out. So e-mail me if you want to share any specifics and chat about them. Love your writing!
Great post, Mary. Relationship boundaries have been BIG on God’s agenda in my life for a long time. I hope I get it right one day because, painful as it is, there is peace inside His borders!
~I should have said, “painful as it is to get there” ~ =D
I found your blog from your comment on Anne Jackson’s blog. I like how you expressed this thought about friendship. “I’m learning to take a deep breath before jumping in to a friendship and in that deep breath I ask God to affirm the friendship.” God is also teaching me about boundries in friendship.