Do you ever feel like you're beating your head against a closed door? I do. And the funny thing — I just taught on setting aside your wants for God's will.
Now, I'm living the lesson. Seems I have to live out every single thing I teach… maybe I ought to just teach the fun stuff and leave the hard stuff for other people.
Just when I think I'm slightly together, everything about me falls apart. And there I am, in pieces.
I WANT what I WANT! It's what I WANT to shout. And what I want is good. It's not bad. It's positive. It's fun. But it's not for me. The Lord has closed door after door. And here I stand pounding my fist shouting ‘I WANT THIS! Let me in!' Apparently, I am a slow learner.
So here I stand — packing up my wants, with tears running down my face. I don't want to walk away from this. It's been my desire for a long time. I KNOW it's time to step away, but I want so bad to stay.
I KNOW God's will is just beyond this want and I know I'll step into it as soon as I pack up this want. Knowing is one thing and doing is another. I'm REAL good at knowing. It's the doing that trips me up!
Are you packing up any wants today?
Oh yes – you are speaking right to me …
how many times I keep turning right back down the same road and making the same decisions out of fear, security, selfishness, pride ….
Why do I not just give up and let God take complete control …. it is easier to just follow than to try to lead especially when His plans are so much better than ours 🙂
Much love
Oh, how I can relate to this!! I keep pounding on the shut door – why cannot I follow HIS plan rather than being a pouting 2-year-old pouting that I want MY way??? UGH!
I’ve got some suitcases you can borrow for all that packing. Been on that trip a few years back. The scenery is painful but the destination is Divinely Ordained.
I’m currently stuck in the land known as Waiting. Timing is everything to Him and until it’s His time here I sit. I do not like Waiting but until He goes on with me I’m not going anywhere.
Love to you! J