I could use a life map. Nothing really detailed, just kind of an overview. Sort of like a timeline thing.
Marry wonderful man (that totally happened)
Have really cute daughters (that happened, too)
Daughter #1 hits teens / she survives/ so do you
Daughter #2 hits teens (I'll keep you posted on the progress)
You get the idea – just a barebones sketch of a plan. I'm in that limbo zone – have you ever been there? That place that feels like you're waiting, but you don't know what you're waiting on. That's my life right now.
I could use a bit more information, Lord. I'm just wondering where we're headed next. There are so many ideas whirling around in my brain. Do I do this or maybe I'll do that? Should I stay over here, or head over there? The last couple of years have been filled with ups, downs, twists, turns, and a couple of loopity loops. It's been a wild ride, this life of mine, but I wouldn't trade it for anything. The ups, the downs and mostly the loopity loops — they're scary, breathtaking, but fun.
Tonight, while I pondered this question in the back of my mind, my pastor preached a message from Isaiah:
For My thoughts are not your thoughts, and your ways are not My ways. This is the Lord's declaration. For heaven is higher than earth, so My ways are higher that your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts.
Feels like the Lord sent me an answer about the next days, weeks, years and a lifetime. I don't get to know details, not even sketchy ones. I don't have to understand because I can't. I don't get to know all the God-stuff, it's just not possible because I'm not God. That sounds really simple, doesn't it? I'm not God, but there are so many times that I go through my day acting like I'm God and I've got it all under control. Not really the way I want to act, but I do it.
I think I'll hold onto the scripture from Proverbs 3:5-6, Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean out on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will guide your path.
I'm going to leave God in control and stop trying to make my own map. I'll just trust that God has a better handle on this whole life thing and I'll just trust in Him and look to Him. He's much better at the God-stuff than I am.
Have a great one!